I’m glad the internet has made it so easy for people to express themselves. Self-expression is, as a rule, a good thing for humanity.

Unfortunately the tantalizing power to respond immediately with a slap (or a suck up) has been handed to millions (of idiots) in the form of an unfollow, star, RT or FF. The challenge for writers is to fight the overwhelming desire to A) draw conclusions about your success/failure/self-worth, and B) adjust accordingly. It’s the “needy underbelly” of Twitter, and it’s detrimental to your creative health. 

The moment you decide to calibrate your writing to affect an outcome other than your own pride in your work, you have enslaved yourself and hampered your vision. How can you possibly write what you know or what you *really* feel if you’re compulsively checking for instantaneous, quantified, and ranked feedback?

Hyperbole alert: Picasso wouldn’t have become Picasso if he were responding to anything other than his own sense of expression and innovation. American Idol has not discovered a Bruce Springsteen and Last Comic Standing has not produced a Louis C.K. Sorry folks, but crowd-sourcing art only forces creators to dumb down, smooth out, and stay safe. And the best comedy is anything but safe.

So do yourself a favor and tear your eyes away from the numbers. If you lose followers after saying something original and funny and smart and personal, then I say: good riddance! You’ll gain 10 more in a minute because you’re being honest, and honesty in comedy trumps all (even puppets and watermelons and teenage sexbots). Write for you and what turns you on.** The love will come.

**does not pertain to crotch shots