We asked the lovely Lauren Caltagirone to name her top five tweets and here they are for your reading pleasure:
Three glasses of wine later I booked a non refundable ticket to Tokyo for the entire month of June!
— elan gale (@theyearofelan)
If you aren’t prepared to get me a deeper, richer tan, it’s time to say goodbye
— Bridger Winegar (@bridger_w)
Fact is, I could probably play most sports at a professional level, but the lifestyle’s not for me. Plus I don’t always “play by the rules.”
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) April 28, 2013
Signs that things aren’t going well: 1) u talk about flood insurance on speed dates. 2) u sell poisonous frog calendars at stop signs.
— eddie pepitone (@eddiepepitone) April 22, 2013
Gonna crawl around this shoe store and tell them I like their shoes but since I’m a crawler I don’t really need shoes
— AmberTozer (@AmberTozer) April 30, 2013
It’s official: the Weiner puns are coming.
Anthony Weiner announced he’s running for mayor of New York City in a campaign video that explained why the repentant crotch-tweeter had so much trouble with 21st century technology:
A middle-class kid in Brooklyn. I thought we had it all. Playing stickball late into the night. And if we were lucky, a Mets game on the weekends.
If YOU grew up in 1930s Brooklyn, you’d be confused about how Twitter works too.
Photo by Douglas Graham/CQ-Roll Call Group/Getty Images
BREAKING: Man Named Weiner Who’s Noted For Sexting Talks About “Playing Stickball Late Into The Night” Because Why Not Pile It On Thick









